rambling

waaaa

hellow.... i suppose i should give life updates and general thoughts on things and the website since its been so long since ive made a decent blogpost. the summer vacation started a while ago, i graduated high school, and life has been quite boring for what i have been doing with my time for the most part. i went to an arts fest in my city a few days ago with my irl friend i've known since 2017, and it was pretty cool though i felt like i was awkward at times. right before we left to go home she told me she would dm me later but she never did waaa(μ_μ) i am scared that my facial expressions were too monotone because the tism and she was put off.... i frequently tweak about irls hating me because i barely have any and rarely hang out with them lmao
i bought a camera off ebay because my old one, a nikon coolpix s3100, had a lens error and broke... it was very expensive and i am hoping i do not have to pay the tariff fees because it was from okinawa waaahhh... its a really cool camera though, it's a blue sony cybershot and i am very excited for when it gets here. having a cool camera will give me an excuse to go out more, because i kinda just stay inside all day as of late. i hope to take many awesome photos and upload them to my future photo gallery page..!
as well as having a photo gallery, i am also going to have a recipes page as you can see on my main page. admittedly i do not cook many interesting things as much as i'd like to, but i want to do it more. i will post cool recipes i've made within the past few years on there. one of which is this cornbread cake i made in november 2023, which was reallyyy good but i messed up by putting the figs inside the cake and they shouldve just been on top of it u_u

best thing i evar made
i wish i could bake more, but i haven't the motivation..... after MONTHS of waiting, i recently got on an adhd medication (transdermal patch though, because i hate pills) and it ................. doesnt work at all. no effect whatsoever. in fact i feel like my adhd symptoms worsened.. (×﹏×) that really sucks because i was waiting for so long, i suppose i can get on a higher dose because maybe thats why but still... i also want to be motivated enough to keep up a job. i recently applied to a local museum for the walking tour position, and they actually replied to my application and set up a phone screening!! however, i feel like i was sort of saying umm and uh too much which may be bad for the role it is, since it's a very speech-heavy job... i have to walk around the neighboring city for 1-3 miles multiple times a day while talking all the while... its been a few days since the screening and i haven't gotten a response saying Yes we want an interview or NO we hate you yet... i really need a job because i love MONEY! i keep spending it recklessly though oops
i haven't really been doing much with my time tbh, i spend a lotttt of time just chipping away on my website without doing any other hobbies, which may be bad. i want to draw more often, but i can't find the motivation to as much anymore ... very sad... i did make a new sona recently though i guess

buggirl sona inspired by tamahimesama
i think that is all i have to write right now, if i think of anything else i shall make a new post... thank you for reading